You can choose not to have sex until you feel you are ready. When you are not having sex over a period of time, we say you are abstaining from sex. People choose to abstain from sex for a number of very good reasons.
Here are some reasons you may not have thought about:
- If you delay sex, you delay the risk of pregnancy - and can stay in school or even go on to college and earn money to support yourself and your family when you are older.
- Delaying sex means not worrying about pregnancy or STIs when you should be enjoying being young and healthy.
- Delaying sex is an act of self-protection and planning for the future you want.
- Agree only when you’re ready. That will be a decision you respect. You might not be so happy about a decision you were pressured to make.
- Saving yourself for a special person or your wedding night makes the experience special and memorable for both of you. Keep this motto in your head: I am waiting for the right time, the right love and the right man or woman!
The pressure to lose your virginity may be intense. Respect yourself enough to make your own decision and agree only when you’re ready.
Sexy, not sex
There are a number of other great ways you can be sexy without having penetrative sex (vaginal, anal or oral). You can kiss, touch each other, cuddle, go to the movies or play games. Many people also masturbate in private if they feel aroused. These are all safe behaviours as you wait for the time that is right for you. This may come at 16, for others at 18, others at 20, 25 or 30. Everyone’s decision is right for him or her.
Abstinence or waiting for the right time is a choice you can be proud of. You can make this choice any time.
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